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The Pencil Holder

Posted by Susan Stoltz on


Recently my nieces gave me a bag full of presents! Who doesn’t like that? Everything in the bag was part of a theme – cactus. They know how much I like cactus, especially the saguaro. One of the gifts was a pencil holder. A saguaro pencil holder. A saguaro pencil holder wearing sunglasses.

At first this was a grand novelty. I joyously put him on my desk and stuffed his head with pencils and pens, scissors, highlighters and what-not.

It didn’t take too long, however, before the pencil holder began to judge me and hold me accountable whenever I was clearly wasting time and not writing. On Facebook? Wasting time. Pinterest? Wasting time. Taking vocabulary quizzes? Really wasting time. Looking at memes of cute animals? COMPLETE waste of time. He sits there silently staring at me through his sunglasses all judgy-like. Sometimes I turn him around, but this does no good. I know he’s still judging me. 

The flip side to being judged by a cactus with pencils sticking out of his head is that I seem to accomplish more than I used to. I also get off the computer to get away from his pietistic glare. Therefore, the dishes actually get done, as well as the laundry. Occasionally I even clean out a drawer or two.

I’m not certain how he gained his holier-than-thou status. After-all, he’s simply a glass cactus with an attitude.

So, dear readers, I leave you with this little ditty.

Mr. Saguaro there you are,
Smug, sanctimonious from afar.
You serve good purpose holding things,
Pencils, scissors, sometimes rings.
I’m not sure how you gained such power,
Your glare, sometimes, can make me cower.
Yet you will stay for reasons three;
You’re useful, trendy, and were given to me,
By nieces whom I love so much,
Just wish you were less a such-and-such!


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